Hug Bear Dino

wayne
By
|
@wayne_elise | FB
Filed Under: Life Lesson, Smarmy Dialogue
Rated: 18+



Let’s face it, we want to impress people. I want to impress you right now. And no matter how long I meditate it’s hard to get far from my ego-driven Me-machine. “Please, like me!” See. Impossible.

But it’s okay to want to excite and impress people. This weakness is just part of our human condition. It’s why we have Facebook. It’s why I stick pictures of my girlfriend on my blog: www.wayneelise.com 🙂 We just can’t out-Zen it.

The challenge for us is to be exciting while not overstepping our truth-bond with other people. We want to be known as interesting but also TRUTHFUL.

Many people are frankly, out there, in the field, lying. Not you of course. But people. That’s too bad. However, when the lights start flashing and we see that dude with the 70′s collar and gold chains hauling around a ten it’s easy for even normally law-abiding people such as you and me to become seduced by the idea of pumping up our reality. I can’t tell you how often I’ve heard otherwise honest guys claim to have seen three strippers in a hair-pulling fight outside a bar when indeed, there were no strippers and no fight.

With this in mind I want to share with you ten phrases that’ll allow you to make your conversations mire exciting while maintaining your truthfulness.

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Hug Bear Party

gerard
By
|
@Gdancer | FB
Filed Under: Humor
Rated: 18+



Erika and I attended a Jay-Z concert last week. Empire State of Mind brings tears to my eyes. I love that song.

I remember saying years ago I would never live in New York City. “It’s too loud, too crowded, too in love with itself. I hate Jay-Z. Why can’t he wear his hat the right way?”

Funny, how time can erode our opinions. These days, I’m New York’s bitch.

How did that happened?…

Well, one day I had my life plotted ahead. It belonged to me like a credit card with my name on it. I walked around feeling smug about it. Then the next day I was standing in line at the coffee shop, I reached into my back pocket and it was gone! I dropped to my knees.

That was three years ago. I experienced a major plot turn. Bang! My wife was gone. House gone. Money gone. The Formica dining-room set I was so proud of was being carried out the door by a short Bruce Willis.

“Need help?” I asked.

“Yippee ki-yah mother fucker,” was all he said.

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The Swimming Pool




I sit and watch them work. Their hands pour lattes, load ovens, make change for customers. Their voices call out in French mostly – in English when necessary.

The Black Girl seems tall for a woman and strong. She is very black. Nigerian I would guess. Men usually make an impulse decision when they look at a woman. But it’s more fun when we have to ponder. After a minute of watching her move around colleagues, strong-arm the La Marzocco and smile at customers, I decide I would.

The Small Girl’s ruddy cheeks betray her youth. She greets an old woman at the counter with a smile.

The old woman scowls and looks up at the menu board. “Don’t you have tea – simple English tea? We’re in Briton if I do recall.”

Her Yorkies take the moment to tangle their leashes around her cane and begin yipping at each other. This doesn’t please the old woman. She stares down at the Small Girl through horn-rimmed glasses.

“I will see what I can do for you,” says the Small Girl. She turns and speaks rapidly to the Tall Man behind her in French.

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wayne
gerard
Ricky
ralph
erika
bear
charismo
genie